Three Reasons You Feel Stuck – and How to Break Free.

When you feel stuck in your work, relationships, finances, health, or any other area of life, the underlying cause is contracted awareness. You can’t see the possibilities all around you because you’re caught up in the swirling confusion of fear, negativity, mistaken assumptions, and limiting beliefs. The key to getting unstuck is expanding your awareness. When your awareness expands, limitations dissolve and fulfillment becomes natural and easy.

Let’s look at three of the most common reasons for feeling stuck – and how expanding your awareness will free you to move forward with joy and creativity.

1. Your mind is stuck in the past.

When we want to step forward in a new direction, our mind has a natural tendency to look to the past and try to find solutions based on what it already knows. If we once tried to start our own business and didn’t meet with the success we desired, our mind may tell us that we aren’t cut out for entrepreneurship and that we should stay in our “safe” job. Or we may have received a message from a parent that we weren’t lovable, and today that deep-seated belief is keeping us stuck in unfulfilled or unhealthy relationships. In reality, the mind can never know what is going to happen but can only project based upon the past or what it already knows. The known is a memory, and to live in the known is to live in the prison of the past. The unknown, on the other hand, is the field of all possibilities. When we step into the unknown, we are free of the past and open ourselves to new ideas, fresh perspectives, and flashes of insight.

Meditation is one of the most valuable practices you can use to stay present and open to a reality that is not simply a replaying of past experiences. In meditation, you step out of repetitive thought loops into a state of expanded awareness. As you meditate regularly, we spontaneously let go of old conditioning and rigid thinking. You can also practice present moment awareness throughout the day. Ask yourself, “Am I aware?” Then put your attention on the space between your thoughts, the space between your breaths, and the space between you and other people or objects in the room. This simple exercise will bring you back into the present moment, which is the only moment in which you can be free.

2. You’re struggling and exhausting yourself.

Many of us were taught that we can only fulfill our dreams through relentless effort against every obstacle. While determination and focus are valuable qualities, struggle is a sign that you’re expending needless energy and keeping yourself stuck. When you’re exhausted and

stressed, you miss opportunities because your attention is scattered or focused on negative outcomes.

In contrast, when you’re feeling centered and calm, you’re open to creativity, inspiration, and serendipity. Instead of trying to force things to happen, everything you need comes naturally to you. The world’s great innovators, athletes, and other high achievers have described this state as “being in the flow.” It is a state of expanded awareness that allows you to move effortlessly in the direction of your highest purpose.

When you find yourself caught up in mental struggle, often the best thing you can do is take a break and refresh your mind, body, and spirit. Leave your desk and go for a walk outdoors, letting the movement and sensory impressions revive you. Even just ten minutes of brisk walking can reinvigorate you and open the doors to fresh insight. You may find a more demanding physical activity, such as cycling or running, helps you let go of stress and mental exhaustion. Experiment and find out what works best for you.

It’s also important to dissolve the habit of struggle. Instead of reacting in the same frustrating way over and over, take a step back and try something new. If you’re exhausted, let yourself rest and get the sleep you need. As you cultivate a more relaxed, open attitude, you prepare the way for awareness to start doing more of the work. 

3. You doubt yourself and feel unworthy.

Self-judgment is one of the greatest reasons that people get stuck. When you judge yourself as unworthy, many possibilities are closed off. Instead of living in the flow of love, grace, abundance, and joy, you keep your expectations low. You may resist the positive changes that lead to lasting fulfillment. Even though you have many skills and talents, you may stay stuck in a position that no longer challenges you because it feels too risky to go for what you really want.

The path to true self-worth is discovering who you really are. Although you may identify yourself with your job title, successes, failures, relationships, and culture, all of these are external, transient qualities. As the world’s great wisdom traditions teach, your true self is infinite, unbounded, and eternal. When you live from an awareness of your true self, you are free of limitation and willing to step into the unknown. Instead of feeling isolated, you feel connected to all that exists. You view yourself and the world with compassion. You feel alive with creative possibilities and move forward with confidence.

Your own awareness is the key to discovering your true self. In addition to meditating and physical activity, as you go about your day, be mindful of the sensations, images, feelings, and thoughts you experience. Sometimes you may feel happy and clear, while other times you may feel distressed and scattered. Pay attention to the one who is noticing this ever-changing landscape of internal experiences. This silent observer is your true self. Activity comes and goes but the observer is steady and present. Whenever you find yourself feeling worried, upset, or

overwhelmed, take a deep breath and shift your attention to the silent observer. The settled presence of your awareness will allow emotional turbulence to dissipate, including self-doubts and feelings of unworthiness.

Remember that “stuckness” never has to be permanent. Even if you feel like you’ve been stuck forever, you always have the freedom to choose a new story by making small shifts in your awareness every day. Anyone can use the simple practices described in this post to expand awareness and discover the unlimited possibilities that surround us in every moment.