March 11, 2021
Ask Deepak

Parents’ Divorce.


When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.


Dear Deepak, My parents are going through a divorce right now and both are confused, hurting, weak, depressed and angry with each other and themselves. They worry a lot about money, and they never trusted each other enough to discuss this subject thoroughly during their marriage. I am wondering what to do, what is my role here, do I listen to them when they need to talk (separately)? How much is too much? I feel overwhelmed sometimes and I don’t want to become hopeless and depressed either. Sometimes I feel I want to encourage them to continue with the process, then I think it’s not my business to do this. But they are so unclear about what to do, and entangled in their own emotions. I meditate and I am encouraging them to do so as well, but their emotions get the better of them often. What can I do to help? Should I help? Thank you for any advice With much love and gratitude (and thank you for all the answers to the other questions on this website, they are a blessing).


Your observations sound very grown up, so I’m assuming you are an adult and not a precocious teenager trying to fix her parents’ marriage.  Your impulse to help is commendable, but you need to understand that as difficult as it is to watch the process your parents are going through, it is not your job to make it better. And however painful their process may be, they are growing through it and you don’t want to deny them that outcome by intervening. Let them know you love them and if you feel you are strong enough, you can offer that you are available to both of them, as a non-judgmental listener but that you are not taking any sides. However, I think it is preferable that they speak with a non-family member, a therapist with whom they can speak more openly about their intimate relationship concerns that won’t impinge upon your relationship with them as your parents.



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