Giving without expectation.
When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.
Question:
How do you balance giving without expectation to being taken advantage of? After many years in an unbalanced long-term relationship and many discussions where the lack of balance and attempts to address my needs are made secondary, if referred to at all, I am considering a major life change. But in meeting my needs, I will cause great pain for those around me. This internal and external dialogue has disturbed my peace for years.
Response:
As long as you are conscious about what you are giving and are explicit in communicating that to others, then no one can take advantage of your generosity. For instance, maybe you are asked to help co-ordinate a fundraiser for your child’s school. You are concerned that you’ll be taken advantage of by the other organizer in that she’ll end up saying she’s too busy and leave you to do the whole event on your own. Perhaps you are known as a very conscientious and responsible person who would never let the school down and allow the event to be a failure. In this scenario, it would be easy to think of yourself as someone who could be taken advantage of.
However, if you know up front how much of your time and energy you are honestly willing to give to this event, then no one can take advantage of you. If you say you can really only put in x hours and if that is enough, then great, but if it isn’t I can’t put in the extra time to ensure the event is a success. Or if you do have the time and energy to do whatever it takes to see the project all the way through, then if that’s how it plays out, then you’re fine with it because that is something you are willing to give freely.
People who feel they are taken advantage of by others, often overlook the self-belief that puts them in that position. This is the idea that their generosity should be acknowledged and rewarded. When it isn’t, you feel used. But if you give freely what is in your capacity, then you will never feel used.
Love,
Deepak
