May 3, 2023
Ask Deepak

Enlightened Marriage.


When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.


Dear Deepak, thank you for all that you give and all your amazing teachings! I have been separated from my husband for one year and could see how my stories and his stories ruined the relationship. I understand that I have to be that which I want to receive. But letting go of the EGO means I no longer need to be understood, loved, seen in a relationship. So I asked if we should try to make the marriage work and he was very willing. I got this sad feeling, because we are very different, he is passive, non-active and what I would previously say “boring.” I want to travel, live abroad, and have experiences. He does not need this and likes TV and staying at home. But he has many wonderful qualities of kindness, responsibility, generosity. When you have full enlightenment can you love any person and be married to any person? How can I save the marriage when we are so different? Will I have to continue to work on separating my EGO, surrender and so feel totally content?


Making a marriage work requires emotional flexibility and honesty about who you are right now in terms of your needs and wants. It’s true that as you grow in consciousness, your ego needs gets smaller, and your true self gets stronger, but you can’t build a loving relationship on an ideal of what you will be like when you are enlightened and you no longer have ego needs. And to be enlightened doesn’t mean you no longer have a personality with likes and dislikes, and traits that work better with a certain type of partner more than another. But a partnership that is spiritually compatible does not necessarily mean you both share the same interests and behaviors. Often compatibility means that one partner balances out the other side of the relationship, creating a dynamic wholeness. 



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