Confession.
When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.
Question:
Hi Deepak, First of all I would like to thank you for putting words to the practice of living truth, I find great comfort and inspiration in reading your books and am motivated to look beyond my limits and find my witnesser within. I am 17 years old and have recently begun treading this spiritual path. Thus far I feel like I have made a lot of mistakes and haven't lived a life of complete honesty. I used to lie to my parents a lot to get what I wanted. I see now how selfish I have been, and as a result have told my parents the truth. But since my confession, they have been very upset with me. My father doesn't speak to me and my mother and grandmother keep reminding me that I have sinned and have ruined their reputation. I am very happy with my decision to tell them the truth but I have difficulty with my feelings of guilt. I feel like I have wronged them and myself. I recently started meditating and find that on the level of stillness I feel no guilt, but once I have lost that stillness I find myself feeling extremely hurt, guilty and lonely. What can I do to alleviate these feelings?
Deepak's Response:
I don’t know what you lied to your parents about, but having confessed to your family in the spirit of being more honest, it seems excessively harsh for them to shun you. Give it time and ask what you can do to make things better. Teenagers have been manipulating the truth with their elders for thousands of years, this is not that big of a deal. No family reputations have been irrevocably lost on your account, so don’t buy into that guilt trip. You have done the right thing by coming clean with your family, and they will come around eventually. In the meantime, keep meditating and the hurt and guilt will soon dissipate.
Love,
Deepak
Awareness and sincere effort to do what one feels right is most important. We all do things we may not be feeling good while doing....just for the momentary gain. But it is what we learn from it and how soon we do what we got to do is the important aspect. Parents would naturally feel hurt and maybe angry....it is just a matter of time and they too will respect the courage with which one has told the truth. Hurt and guilt are natural outcome when an awareness of having done something which has hurt others, is created.....but it is not the end all....it is just the beginning of our work towards self-development and should soon be replaced with feeling of having achieved truthfulness in our lives.
First of all I would like to commend you on being so open and brave at such a young age. Many people do not find the courage to be so congruent with themselves, and with others, until a much, much later stage of life, if at all. It is as though you have embraced who you are - which is ultimately, in its purest form - Love. The family you mention who speak of sinning and shame seem to be coming from that place we call Fear. Strive to remain in your state of honesty, openness and trust in the universe. Love will then guide you to make the correct decisions for yourself and your future journey. With Love and Bliss
Of course this young person has to find his or her own way in life. And also mistakes will be made. But this sounds like a conscientious person who will turn out just fine. The thing that bothers me is that the writer mentions how her family members declare that she has sinned. Although the letter does not define what is meant by that term, it probably arises from the perspective of fundamentalism. If this is the case then it could create a problem of trust. Like most people, we want and need approval from our parents. If a child does not recieve the parents approval, even when he of she does something wrong, the child will not go to the parents anymore with their problems. I hope this is not the case for this young person.