Unfeeling.
When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.
Question:
I have been detached from everything around me. If I have money I spend it and if I don’t have it, I don’t miss it. There’s nothing that I miss. It’s fine as long as material things are concerned, but when it comes to people around me, I feel something is wrong with me. I find it very easy to give up people and have accepted death of near ones very easily, without crying. On watching a few movies, however, I cry a little. Sometimes I feel I don’t love anyone and whatever I do for others is out of duty for them. Sometimes I feel I internalize my feelings and put a mental block on them so much so that I rarely miss the people who are not there. Can meditation help me get over my feeling of guilt at not being so worldly attached to those who love me? Is there some goal I must set for myself during meditation? Please help me.
Response:
What you describe isn’t spiritual non-attachment arising from self-awareness, it seems more like you have become disconnected from you’re the natural expression of your heart and feelings. If some movies can get past your defenses and get you to cry, that suggests that you are afraid of showing your feelings in real circumstances where you have something at stake. I think you are right that you are putting a judgmental block on your emotions.
Ask yourself what it is about letting others see your true feelings that scares you? Are you afraid of losing control? Of looking weak or vulnerable? Do you think that if someone knew you cared about them that they would use that against you? These are all indications of someone who does not knowing their true self. Meditation can give you that experience of your core self and that can give you the sense of security to express your feelings without worrying about looking weak or losing control.
Love,
Deepak
