October 27, 2021
Ask Deepak

Leaving a Relationship.


When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.


Dear Deepak, How do you feel about someone leaving a relationship after many years (16 to be exact)? Is this a letdown to the universe to be a part of something for so long and then make the decision to leave? Both partners are monogamous and the breakup is not for another person; it is for me. In spite of my love for my partner, I feel that if I don’t leave this relationship that I will never reach my potential. I have never felt spiritually supported by her and though she claims to be committed to her own spiritual growth, she makes no real effort and has many times chosen to behave/react with judgment, disdain, superiority, and the like. She also has many good qualities, but for much of the past 2 years, her fear-based behaviors have dominated and I feel she is someone else, someone I do not want to spend the rest of my life with, even after all this time, even knowing her potential. My own fears have prevented me from moving on, but that is a thing of the past. I am committed to continuing the path of my spiritual journey and much as I would like to witness my partner’s spiritual development (I am hopeful that she will make it there eventually), I am afraid it may not happen in this lifetime. I don’t want to give up on her, but nor do I want to become stuck. I would like to add that she is content staying as we are, but that requires pretending to be happy.


Leaving a long term relationship doesn’t mean you are letting the universe down.  The real implications of the separation depend on the specific situation and circumstances. If it is time for a new direction for your lives and greater love and happiness will come from each of you growing in different directions, then it is better for the universe and all involved to move on. The only thing I would add is that leaving a relationship because you don’t think you can spiritually grow because your partner is not as motivated or interested as you are is tricky. It could be that your spiritual growth is about learning to follow your path in these less-than-ideal circumstances. That is a call you need to make on your own.



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