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February 22 2013

Ask Deepak - What Are the Secrets of Charisma

Category:  Ask Deepak Videos

What are the three qualities of a charismatic leader? Is charisma something you are born with, or is it something we can acquire?

Published by

In this episode of “Ask Deepak” on The Chopra Well, Deepak addresses these qualities and how they manifest themselves in leaders like Bill Clinton. Deepak outlines three key ingredients to charisma, demonstrated by the greatest leaders in history. Leadership may come more naturally to some than to others, such as Deepak’s example of Bill Clinton, but we can all learn to practice these skills over time. They are what Deepak teaches in his “Soul of Leadership” course at Kellogg School of Management, and also in his book by the same name.

Find out more about Deepak's book Soul of Leadership!

The three keys to charisma:

1. Be completely present in the moment. Make those you interact with feel that they are the most important person in that moment.

2. Be responsive to feedback but immune to both criticism and flattery. You will not be offended by criticism, and your actions will not be influenced by flattery.

3. Radiate warmth through compassion, empathy, joy, and equanimity.

This Ask Deepak video about The Secrets of Charisma is the courtesy of The Chopra Well.

Top comments

  • You are charismatic dear Deepak

    Veronique Menand // 2013-01-17 18:49:35 // //
  • Listen the childrens what they want..

    André Lages Nogueira // 2013-01-17 16:03:08 // //



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All comments

  • genuine concern for people

    Meta Commerse // 2013-02-26 16:41:54 // //
  • A cool name ,Angels,and a light saber, :) ... you got crono fever infected, bitten by the hawk Deepak loves the hawk !

    Crono Hawk // 2013-02-25 21:09:51 // //
  • I really don't warm to the concept of leadership because to me it relies on followship - and it's time now for people to be centred in their own intuition rather than looking to be lead by another's IMHO. I have't found the word for the model for social change that needs to come next - but for me it needs to have a far more liberating vibe than leadership.

    MariaIn Metroland // 2013-02-24 19:44:24 // //
  • Hey, just thought I'd let you know about this great Disney offer. Disneyland is giving away 4 free tickets to all Facebook users. Hope I got to you in time before it expired. You can get it here >>> enjoy!! 192

    Jamie Fox // 2013-02-24 14:55:42 // //
  • Charismatic leader is not always a good leader, charisma is the glue that makes people choose a person to lead. A true leader will never be a politician, Thank you

    Hedva Golinski // 2013-02-24 07:16:40 // //
  • i love the man, but why in the heck does he have to sport those glasses...with the two layers of rhinestone (or should we surmise that they are diamonds). of the vices of being a human being. I guess it's a gift to us that even Deepak is vulnerable. Anyway..that was off subject.

    Roberto Molly Negron // 2013-02-23 19:21:02 // //
  • do you recall Dr. LUANNe Oaks...lets say pray of peace to a charisc leader that followed your path...namaste deepak.. I miss her and feel apart of me unbalanced without her guidance..

    Martina Dayton // 2013-02-23 18:00:15 // //
  • Then for sure Oprah is a charismatic leader.

    Carol Lani Johnson // 2013-02-23 17:50:01 // //
  • You nailed it!

    Stuart A. Mehler // 2013-02-23 17:45:42 // //
  • with charisma!!

    Denise Henderson // 2013-02-23 17:21:28 // //
  • Wow...that's wat i call awesome..cheers :)

    Ayan Kumar Banerjee // 2013-02-23 17:10:53 // //
  • Going to India mnext week for the first time! SO excited!

    Mati Peñuela Devi // 2013-02-23 16:39:06 // //
  • yep !!

    Jesus Lets-Go // 2013-02-23 16:33:19 // //
  • make us laugh... think... and take us to look inside of us

    Laura Andreina Rojas // 2013-02-23 16:20:03 // //
  • Cool Deepak!!

    Atasi Mukherjee // 2013-02-23 16:19:20 // //

    Fanny Subirana // 2013-02-23 16:17:11 // //
  • Love it, thank you 4 sharing! Xoxo

    Michelle Fontaine // 2013-02-23 16:14:12 // //
  • shared**

    Gayle Williamson // 2013-02-23 16:05:08 // //
  • Awesome Deepak!!

    Atasi Mukherjee // 2013-02-23 16:02:35 // //
  • someone with charisma is a good listener. When one is a good listener one is able to replace oneself in the other person`s feelings, or story or whatever s/he expresses. Reason why the feminine still is soo much underestimated because this is a feminine virtue...........

    // 2013-02-22 14:40:26 // //
  • Thank you.

    Susan Miller Dorsey High School // 2013-02-20 21:36:28 // //
  • like

    Sandhya Devi Jhowry // 2013-02-20 07:12:25 // //

    Helen Rule-Todd // 2013-02-19 18:11:17 // //
  • Respectful -understanding-great listener -as Deepak for instance Thank you Namasté

    Addie Wesselius // 2013-02-19 17:33:36 // //
  • Lives their truth, respects the truth of others, does not impose, DOES NOT LEAD - people naturally follow.

    Tessa Piotrowski Kristensen // 2013-02-19 17:07:31 // //
  • Fulfills needs, always observing and aware, listens to everyone and everything out of passion for their goals

    Brenda Kay // 2013-02-19 16:39:43 // //
  • <3 love is the ultimate leadership..

    Djalma Luiz Gentile Mendes // 2013-02-19 16:16:58 // //
  • Looking great Deepak-Ji

    Teija Ahlfors // 2013-02-19 16:15:16 // //
  • summary: what are the characteristics of a charismatic leader?: 3 characteristics of charismatic leaders, they are : *present in the moment *not affected by criticism or flattery (equanimitity: treat all the same) * warm (empathy,joy) in deepak chopra`s opinion (not mine) he thinks Bill Clinton is an example of a charismatic leader.

    // 2013-01-29 06:52:38 // //
  • "If I put an article up on telling people exactly how to hit the New York Times list, even if I give them the exact prescription, very few will go through and execute on it." - Tim Ferriss@London Real

    Alexander Andreosatos // 2013-01-23 17:22:17 // //
  • I am in a public speaking course now and will apply your solid advice! Thank you for being such a commendable teacher now and always!

    Shoshana Jansen // 2013-01-23 17:22:12 // //
  • Nice, but i dont understand a lot of english wen i listen, dou you have what he said on text ¡¡ :) Please

    Jorge O. Ruis
    // 2013-01-23 17:02:42 // //
  • Awesome

    Meena Ramachandran // 2013-01-23 16:32:58 // //
  • Dali lama

    diana saxe
    // 2013-01-23 16:22:09 // //
  • Cool

    Joe Alexander Ovidi // 2013-01-23 16:19:45 // //
  • shared**

    Gayle Williamson // 2013-01-23 16:18:42 // //
  • Wonderful! I agree 100% about Bill Clinton....and yourself, Doctor. Namaste

    Carole Gish Brandt // 2013-01-23 16:12:53 // //
  • fantastic. I love Deepak Chopra! ALWAYS.

    Marley Thomé Abdo // 2013-01-23 16:09:51 // //
  • Are you fighting something Dr.? Namaste.

    Tami Craig Davis // 2013-01-23 16:08:47 // //
  • No words!! Xx

    Lea B N Leal // 2013-01-23 16:05:16 // //
  • oi tudo bem com você?

    Eleni Solange // 2013-01-23 16:04:05 // //
  • awesome

    Eric Sc Cribb // 2013-01-23 16:02:50 // //
  • abundance of intriguing insights Mr Chopra/ charisma is a very interesting phenomena ¬^

    // 2013-01-23 15:43:16 // //
  • “Something opens our wings, something makes boredom disappear. Someone fills the cup in front of us and we taste only sacredness.” Rumi There can be no might without mystery and magic. And this is “CHRISMATISM”. Charismatic personalities are like magic spells, leaving the audience in sheer wonderment. There personality, presence and pull is puzzling, which spellbinds the people around them. There is always something in them that others cannot fully fathom. From down the ages, it has been believed that it’s a God given owes which is bestowed only on rules, leaders, institutions and stars, tend to maintain power and presence and is far from a common man’s capacity. So this charisma was a boon and blessing for the noblesse and those next to God beyond the aspirations of the commoners. Thus we have taken it for granted, that it is- “A Celebrity Caliber.” But we least know that it is a behavioral quality, a force of character, personal presence and gravity which can be acknowledged appreciated, appraised and actualized. Thus anyone can be blessed with this power. If we want to be charismatic “we can be” Some people seem naturally charismatic but others can develop, cultivating their second nature. Every child is born as a small bundle of miracle and joy to their parents. Children breathe charm but as they grow up into an adult, this God gifted divine charm withers through the agencies of our physical world such as parenting, society, education and religious institutions, hammering on the head, the harangue of the physical world from cradle to grave. No matter we are born with the power of charisma but it fails to blossom into a charismatic personality in myriad of masses. But what is this charisma? It is”The gift of grace” The alluring and elusive qualities that makes us shine, the compelling attractiveness or charm that can inspire devotion in others. Is it stunning good looks, a sky high IQ or a jovial personality? No not, it’s the aura of personality such as being self confident, comfortable with who we are, without walking in hired clothes and shoes, blooming with enthusiasm by keeping our glass half fill, being open and approachable and last but not the least, a genuine smile radiating from the being and not just a lip service. When a charismatic person connects with someone, automatically their nervous system gets aroused, their attention is locked unto that person and they tingle with immense energy. I believe it is the authenticity of the personality which enables our body, emotion and intellect to be aligned and purified and there will be charisma in one’s being. Such a being will be radiant, from the divine energy and not overpowering. It is not through words that one can motivate others; it’s by one’s being, by one’s presence. It has been said that when a snake bit Mahavir, milk flowed instead of blood, because his being was as loving as a mother. What to say about humans, even the snake was enchanted and magnetized by his aura. By aligning all the three centers (body, emotion and intellect) there is a quantum in the personality, resulting in a different level of knowing. Here we learn even from the bad situations of life and look for the seeds of wisdom from our difficulties, like the hen who sought grains from the garbage. But why some people gets noticed and others passed by unnoticed. When a person speak with whole heartedness, irrespective of any fear or repercussion, with simplicity, with honesty without trying to influence people, far from any manipulation, just for the purpose of sharing their thoughts, this sincerity, this inner truth, overflows from within, like a rose that opens its petals and want the breeze to take its flavor, its fragrance all over. “The full measure of man is not to be found in the man himself, but in the colors and textures that comes alive in others because of him”.

    Soni Shalini // 2013-01-21 02:47:04 // //
  • Ah Dr. Chopra, I should know better than to doubt you. At first I was a bit perplexed by your choice of an example of charisma, a man with questionable character. Then I realized this is a lesson in charisma, not a lesson in integrity. Well done sir.

    // 2013-01-18 21:56:11 // //
  • ich lese jetzt schon das 5. Buch.... es ist wieder super....

    Marianne Schubert // 2013-01-18 11:49:33 // //
  • Adlai E. Stevenson, Jr. is quoted: “Bad administration, to be sure, can destroy good policy; but good administration can never save bad policy." I agree with Deepak`s qualities of charisma and the fact that Bill Clinton had mastered these behaviors and attitudes, but no amount of charisma can never make up for a lack of integrity when it comes to being worthy of the trust from those whom you would lead. The opposite of a life of integrity is compartmentalizing life. From a blog by Gary Woltal: "I am not saying compartmentalization is not needed at times in our life to keep our sanity. This fake life of multiple lives, double lifes or even triple lifes, has its time in the sun. But remember, you or others are living a lie. You are not integrated as one life. You are not being authentic to oneself. Reasons for this are to protect from pain or advance your own agenda. Pain being steering clear of grief, sadness, shame, or hurt and advancement being your career aspirations and ambition."

    Ron Greenstein // 2013-01-18 10:35:11 // //
  • Not an exhaustive list but nevertheless about the three most important qualities that anyone who's trying to be charismatic must incorporate into their character make-up! I will embrace these qualities to be a better mother!

    Thavamalar Govindasamy // 2013-01-18 04:20:34 // //
  • bill clinton is a liar ..... monica lewinsky trial....he took an oath and lied before a judge! .... bunch him along w OJ and other `charismatic` liars... he approved introduced genetically modified foods...monsanto et. al. NO. few politicians are genuinely charismatic if you ask me. i respectfully disagree w the person chosen as example. (don`t ask don`t tell??charisma... i don`t think so)!

    // 2013-01-18 02:33:49 // //
  • I have a question.Where do you think the human race is headed in the relatively near future? This is the first time mankind has had the means to destroy itself! Some believe it is now or never for our race to pull ourselves out of an seemingly inevitable tragic ending. I sense the presence of a monumental crossroads.I am actually one who sees the near future as a do or die moment for mankind. Are you hopeful for us to rise to the occasion?What do you think we need to do? I respect your input..

    // 2013-01-18 01:25:20 // //
  • Gracias !!

    Nina Marin
    // 2013-01-18 00:59:31 // //
  • Deepak,is the heating off? I know, bloody plumers :).. Jock aside... to me everyone has a charisma,... but like everithing else, some use it some don`t, some develop their gifts, some don`t, to some people, some things comes naturally, to some -do not, some need efford , teaching... but we all have it, as the teachers say

    // 2013-01-18 00:38:47 // //
  • Thanks for the tip!

    // 2013-01-17 21:36:48 // //
  • Deepak has it all !

    // 2013-01-17 21:35:09 // //
  • It looks like he has a bit of a cold! A half a tea spoon of Mitragyna Speciosa in some juice, and you will feel a lot better. Don`t underestimate Mother Nature!

    // 2013-01-17 19:09:16 // //
  • Hey freak face, is this an add campaign for a craptastic glasses company?

    Wang Mchugeschlong // 2013-01-17 18:53:24 // //
  • You are charismatic dear Deepak

    Veronique Menand // 2013-01-17 18:49:35 // //
  • Does anyone have a ticket to hear Deepak tomorrow night in San Francisco? I missed the online sales and would love to buy a ticket to this sold out event...Thank YOU!

    Meg O'Shaughnessy // 2013-01-17 17:31:59 // //
  • You`re one..takes one to know one, right? Thank you, Deepak...

    Jane Davis // 2013-01-17 17:02:34 // //
  • Ballin' glasses, Deepak.

    Greg Hayes // 2013-01-17 16:18:47 // //
  • Hi !! Happy new year for you.

    Rosemary Holanda Cavalcanti // 2013-01-17 16:14:30 // //
  • Thank you!

    Allan King // 2013-01-17 16:12:00 // //
  • Liked the vid...till you started mentioning Bill Clinton! I have jokes, but I rather keep them to myself. ;)

    Stella Mora // 2013-01-17 16:07:37 // //
  • [̲̅L̲̅σ̲̅V̲̅є̲̅ ̲̅Y̲̅σ̲̅υ̲̅я̲̅ ̲̅я̲̅є̲̅α̲̅D̲̅I̲̅и̲̅G̲̅ร̲̅ ̲̅'̲̅'̲̅ ̲̅C̲̅н̲̅σ̲̅ρ̲̅я̲̅α̲̅ ̲̅'̲̅'̲̅]

    Lurdinha Cadorim Santos // 2013-01-17 16:07:31 // //
  • mind reader

    Magdalene Kuruk // 2013-01-17 16:07:13 // //
  • To all reading this, would love more prayer warriors for our son, Andrew. Please see link for details. If you click "LIKE" while you are there, you can share the journey along with Andrew. I promise you it is an inspiring ride and God is IN CONTROL of it all! ~ Kellie

    Andrew Burkhart // 2013-01-17 16:03:50 // //
  • thanks good video............

    Gloria Casas // 2013-01-17 16:03:50 // //
  • Love!!!

    André Lages Nogueira // 2013-01-17 16:03:36 // //
  • <3

    André Lages Nogueira // 2013-01-17 16:03:27 // //
  • Listen the childrens what they want..

    André Lages Nogueira // 2013-01-17 16:03:08 // //
  • thanks good video ♥

    Mariann Boda Toth // 2013-01-17 16:02:46 // //
  • Want to press 10000000000 LIKE on this. Thankyou

    // 2013-01-17 05:28:28 // //
  • Thank you ;*

    // 2013-01-17 05:10:23 // //
  • This Man is sooooo real!

    // 2013-01-17 03:56:02 // //
  • Please loose the commercials. Thank you.

    // 2013-01-17 03:43:33 // //
  • Thank you

    // 2013-01-17 01:27:48 // //
  • Very insightful.  Thank you, Deepak.

    // 2013-01-17 01:23:52 // //