Enlightened Marriage.
When your mind and heart are truly open abundance will flow to you effortlessly and easily.
Question:
Dear Deepak,
thank you for all that you give and all your amazing teachings! I have been separated from my husband for one year and could see how my stories and his stories ruined the relationship. I understand that I have to be that which I want to receive. But letting go of the EGO means I no longer need to be understood, loved, seen in a relationship. So I asked if we should try to make the marriage work and he was very willing. I got this sad feeling, because we are very different, he is passive, non-active and what I would previously say “boring”. I want to travel, live abroad, have experiences. He does not need this and likes TV and staying at home. But he has many wonderful qualities of kindness, responsibility, generosity. When you have full enlightenment can you love any person and be married to any person? How can I save the marriage when we are so different? Will I have to continue to work on separating my EGO, surrender and so feel totally content?
Response:
Making a marriage work requires emotional flexibility and honesty about what you who you are right now in terms of your needs and wants. It’s true that as you grow in consciousness, your ego needs gets smaller, and your true self gets stronger, but you can’t build a loving relationship on an ideal of what you will be like when you are enlightened and you no longer have ego needs. And to be enlightened doesn’t mean you no longer have a personality with likes and dislikes, and traits that work better with a certain type of partner more than another. But a partnership that is spiritually compatible does not necessarily mean you both share the same interests and behaviors. Often compatibility means that one partner balances out the other side of the relationship, creating a dynamic wholeness.
Love,
Deepak
I'm trying to locate a copy of Top Ten Practices Of Enlightened Partners; Sathya, 9/10/2001, Namaste Derpak Chopra and Dave Stewart. Could you PLEASE see if you could send me a copy. Thank you so much. Love, melissa
You both should stay together because you both are different. Being alike becomes boring and you would miss lot of other things in life. Each should enjoy what is seen in the partner, that is not seen with-in. This case is a perfect example of unity. Understand that unity is not ONE or BEING ALIKE. Unity is more than one, means minimum 2. Your husband should enjoy travel, going out...etc. You should also start enjoying staying at home. Usually humans get bored of doing same things repeatedly. You have a perfect combination to take on life. Just discuss this with your partner. After some time, as time passes, as you grow, you will start appreciating other "BORING" things. TIME will ensure that. :-)
Years ago I read story of woman who had husband, he staying at home. She cheated on him, she had other rebelious boyfriend who traweled on a motorcykle. She used to trawel with him. Husband didnt know about it. She had two relationships. She loved both, though they are different. Psychologist said that she has split personality. Maybe people often hear stories about cheating. Men have more girlfriends, or they marry more wives in same time, or women have boyfriends. Maybe they have split personality they dont know about it. It is not only about emotional stress, that women fight with men who cheated on them, but it is also about mental health. They start lie, they feel paranoid. It is not healthy if people cheate their parners.